The Facts of the Case:

I own a wicker couch with blue and white floral cushions and pillows. This couch sat outside, undisturbed, at my farmhouse on what is colloquially known as the Moonshine Porch. In the spring, I discovered not twenty yards from the porch, a hole in the ground, belonging to a woodchuck and around which was scattered the remnants of cotton batting. In addition, a torn blue and white floral pillowcase, empty of its batting, was discovered strewn to the side of the hole. As they say in the law, res ipsa loquitor, or in layman’s words, the thing speaks for itself.