• Home
  • Laurentide
    • Farm
    • Cool Women
    • Family
    • Interiors
    • Lessons
    • Procrastination
    • Reviews
    • Travel
    • Vintage Finds
  • Videos
  • Resources
    • Message Me
    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • Twitter
    • Pinterest
    • YouTube
  • Subscribe
  • Search
  • Archive
Menu

The Bubble Joy

Street Address
City, State, Zip
Phone Number
"In folly's cup still laughs the bubble joy." Alexander Pope

Your Custom Text Here

The Bubble Joy

  • Home
  • Laurentide
  • Blog
    • Farm
    • Cool Women
    • Family
    • Interiors
    • Lessons
    • Procrastination
    • Reviews
    • Travel
    • Vintage Finds
  • Videos
  • Resources
  • Contact
    • Message Me
    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • Twitter
    • Pinterest
    • YouTube
  • Subscribe
  • Search
  • Archive

A Duck Comedy Assignment

June 23, 2017 mithra ballesteros

This week, a friend sent a link to a humor writing contest. Called the Royal Nonesuch Humor Writing Contest, it is sponsored by the Mark Twain Museum in Hartford, Connecticut. The deadline is next week, so click here to enter. Full disclosure, you have to pay $23 to submit, but I strongly encourage you to give it a try, as one of the prizes is a gift certificate to the Mark Twain store in Hartford, Connecticut. The "Cat in the Ruff" laminated bookmark is super cute.

This is my sort of contest, and I've been busy searching for my funny. But to no avail. That is, until I looked at this pewter duck from Hong Kong in the photo above. (He's new in the shop and you can click on the photos for shopping information.)

His cute little beak triggered a memory of the much-loved children's book, The Story About Ping. Published in 1933, author Marjorie Flack tells the story of the little yellow duck who lived with his numerous duck clan aboard the wise-eyed boat on the Yang-Tze River. One day, Ping is late returning to the boat, and to avoid the certain spanking, he runs away. He spends the night alone and the next day, looking for his family, he is captured and nearly eaten. Miraculously, he is secretly released into the river where he spots his clan swimming alongside the wise-eyed boat. After bravely accepting the punishment he evaded the day before, Ping is reunited with his family to live happily ever after. It is a soul-crushing book and I hate it.

The illustrations by Kurt Wiese transport us to a China that has nearly disappeared. I love the soft colors and the square sails on the junk boats. But the story itself is f'ed-up, man. There is no moral. Or maybe the moral is that lower-class ducks better suck it up, listen to the man, and conform. Because it's better to be beaten than eaten. I don't know. This is one sick story. 

And I've decided to use my long-suppressed aversion as a creative prompt for this contest.  

Thus, I am departing until next week. If you have thoughts on The Story of Ping, I'd love to hear them! 

And until that essay is finished, here are some humorous duck stories:  

JOKE #1 WITH AMERICAN DUCK

A duck walks into a bar and asks: "Got any bread?"

Barman says: "No."

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

Barman says: "No."

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

Barman says: "No, we have no bread."

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

Barman says: "No, we haven't got any bread!"

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

Barman says: "No, are you deaf?! We haven't got any bread, and if you ask me again and I'll nail your dang beak to the bar you irritating dang duck!"

Duck says: "Got any nails?"

Barman says: "No"

Duck says: "Got any bread?

JOKE #2 WITH ENGLISH DUCK

A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.

The bartender looks at him and says, "Hang on! You're a duck."

"I see your eyes are working," replies the duck.

"And you can talk!" exclaims the bartender.

"I see your ears are working, too," says the duck. "Now if you don't mind, can I have my beer and my sandwich please?"

"Certainly, sorry about that" says the bartender as he pours the duck a pint. "It's just we don't get many ducks in this pub. What are you doing around this way?"

"I'm working on the building site across the road," explains the duck. "I'm a plasterer."

The flabbergasted bartender cannot believe the duck and wants to learn more, but takes the hint when the duck pulls out a newspaper from his bag and proceeds to read it.

So, the duck reads his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich, bids the barman good day and leaves.

The same thing happens for two weeks.

Then one day the circus comes to town.

The ringmaster comes into the pub for a pint and the bartender says to him:

"You're with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches, reads the newspaper and everything!"

"Sounds marvelous," says the ringmaster, handing over his business card. "Get him to give me a call."

So the next day when the duck comes into the pub the bartender says, "Hey Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money."

"I'm always looking for the next job," says the duck. "Where is it?"

"At the circus," says the bartender.

"The circus?" repeats the duck.

"That's right," replies the bartender.

"The circus?" the duck asks again. "With the big TENT?"

"Yeah!" the bartender replies.

"With all the animals who live in CAGES, and performers who live in CARAVANS?" says the duck.

"Of course," the bartender replies.

"And the tent has CANVAS sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?" persists the duck.

"That's right!" says the bartender.

The duck shakes his head in amazement, and says: "What would they want with a plasterer??"


For shopping information on this pair of vintage pewter and brass ducks, click on the photo. They're new at Finder Not Keeper.

Photos by Jane Ballesteros


Every Friday I send out a newsletter with delicious morsels of information from the internet. I also share some of the coolest antiques from my searchings on the Internet that I didn't buy but that you can! Sign up below for what one subscriber described as "the best thing in my mailbox all week." 

Subscribe to The Bubble Joy

In Procrastination Tags humor, Royal Nonesuch Humor Writing Contest, Mark Twain Museum, writing contest, The Story About Ping, Marjorie Flack, Kurt Wiese, duck stories, duck jokes
← The Prettiest Kitchen in LondonThe Iranian Joke Teller →

Mithra B096 copy.jpg

Welcome! I'm Mithra (pronounced Mee-thra). I'm an interior stylist and a writer. I'm also a vintage and antiques lover. I have an online shop, Finder Not Keeper, where I sell my best finds. (That's a white lie. I keep the best finds.) Read more about me and the blog here. 


FIND ME IN YOUR INBOX


CATEGORIES

Cool-Women_png.png
Family_png.png
Interiors_png.png
Procrastinate_png.png
Reviews_png.png
Travel_png.png
Vintage_png.png
Lessons_png.png

Instagram posts

A few days back in the ‘Quon. All of February is the price I’m willing to fork over for one week in September.
A few days back in the ‘Quon. All of February is the price I’m willing to fork over for one week in September.
Latest blog post about our new outdoor shower and the differences of opinion between this guy and his mother (me) on how it should be used. #linkinbio
Latest blog post about our new outdoor shower and the differences of opinion between this guy and his mother (me) on how it should be used. #linkinbio
Brainy, brave, kind, genuine, indefatigable, funny, patriotic, fair, hard working, gentle, strong, iconic.
Brainy, brave, kind, genuine, indefatigable, funny, patriotic, fair, hard working, gentle, strong, iconic.
Those aren’t my hands forming baguettes. But I took the pic. @heat_her_all_a_man has it down  and I’m ready with my salted butter and honey. What do you eat with baguettes?
Those aren’t my hands forming baguettes. But I took the pic. @heat_her_all_a_man has it down and I’m ready with my salted butter and honey. What do you eat with baguettes?
Surveying the herb garden after a good weeding session. Basil took a hit the last couple weeks but everything else is flourishing like summer lasts forever.
Surveying the herb garden after a good weeding session. Basil took a hit the last couple weeks but everything else is flourishing like summer lasts forever.
First restaurant account for @littlelaurentide! Also first time eating out since the snow was flying. Really really fun night. (Not to mention that building’s white with black trim paint color scheme is 💯)
First restaurant account for @littlelaurentide! Also first time eating out since the snow was flying. Really really fun night. (Not to mention that building’s white with black trim paint color scheme is 💯)
Surprise lilies, also known as naked ladies, fit in well here at the farm for reasons we will let you ponder.
Surprise lilies, also known as naked ladies, fit in well here at the farm for reasons we will let you ponder.
This is son #2, the farmer. Walter is working hard to turn this place into a sustainable organic farm. Follow us @littlelaurentide for the latest on how mother and son align, clash, argue, hug.
This is son #2, the farmer. Walter is working hard to turn this place into a sustainable organic farm. Follow us @littlelaurentide for the latest on how mother and son align, clash, argue, hug.
On the blog today, the newest bachelor at Little Laurentide. Will he draw viewers or is he a train wreck along the lines of Juan Pablo Galavis? Read the latest blog post to find out! Link in bio.
On the blog today, the newest bachelor at Little Laurentide. Will he draw viewers or is he a train wreck along the lines of Juan Pablo Galavis? Read the latest blog post to find out! Link in bio.
On the blog today: a tour of the best places on the farm to sit for a spell. And I write a bit about what it’s like to cohabit with a son who used to give me every kind of gray hair. He could teach a polar bear how to be grumpy and I could teac
On the blog today: a tour of the best places on the farm to sit for a spell. And I write a bit about what it’s like to cohabit with a son who used to give me every kind of gray hair. He could teach a polar bear how to be grumpy and I could teach a grizzly bear how to be grumpy. It’s a new world for the two of us, farming together, and can you guess how it’s going??

OLD POSTS

Archive
  • October 2021 1
  • July 2021 1
  • June 2021 1
  • May 2021 2
  • April 2021 3
  • March 2021 1
  • February 2021 2
  • January 2021 2
  • December 2020 2
  • November 2020 1
  • October 2020 2
  • September 2020 1
  • August 2020 5
  • July 2020 7
  • June 2020 6
  • May 2020 9
  • April 2020 8
  • March 2020 4
  • February 2020 3
  • January 2020 5
  • December 2019 1
  • November 2019 4
  • October 2019 3
  • September 2019 3
  • August 2019 4
  • July 2019 7
  • June 2019 5
  • May 2019 8
  • April 2019 8
  • March 2019 8
  • February 2019 7
  • January 2019 7
  • December 2018 8
  • November 2018 9
  • October 2018 8
  • September 2018 7
  • August 2018 9
  • July 2018 6
  • June 2018 7
  • May 2018 7
  • April 2018 5
  • March 2018 4
  • February 2018 4
  • January 2018 4
  • December 2017 1
  • November 2017 3
  • October 2017 3
  • September 2017 4
  • August 2017 4
  • July 2017 4
  • June 2017 5
  • May 2017 3
  • April 2017 5
  • March 2017 3
  • February 2017 2
  • January 2017 4
  • December 2016 5
  • November 2016 4
  • October 2016 3
  • September 2016 5
  • August 2016 4
  • July 2016 5
  • June 2016 4
  • May 2016 4
  • April 2016 4
  • March 2016 5
  • February 2016 8
  • January 2016 8
  • December 2015 6
  • November 2015 9
  • October 2015 9
  • September 2015 8
  • August 2015 8
  • July 2015 5
  • June 2015 4
  • May 2015 5
  • April 2015 4
  • March 2015 4
  • February 2015 4
  • January 2015 5
  • December 2014 4
  • November 2014 4
  • October 2014 6
  • September 2014 2
  • August 2014 3
  • July 2014 5
  • June 2014 3
  • May 2014 3
  • April 2014 4
  • March 2014 6
  • February 2014 5
  • January 2014 4

Powered by Squarespace

Contact: mithra@thebubblejoy.com